Funny Jubail stories

When I first got to Jubail I was simply, horrified. Day One, after the insane bus ride up to Jubail from Damman, had us going to a faux Thai restaurant.A rat ran right across my path.

Holy sh**, where have we landed? The town, “Man town” was filthy. It was full of Indian and Paki men and lots of Saudis. I was the only woman for miles. The restaurant was atrocious.

Matthew,the Christian bus driver and overall helper at Jubail , would often go to buy my prescription drugs. Back then all I needed was Nexium and Iron pills. I had to take a lot of iron pills before menopause.In fact, my hemoglobin was so low, my Doctor wondered how I was able to stand.

I’d be teaching English and there would be a soft knock at the door:Matthew would hand me my drugs and off I go, back to English! Really, it was hilarious!

But it was impossible for women to get around anywhere in Jubail with a car and a driver-impossible.There was no taxi service to be had either. What a ridiculous place it was.

We DID have a lot of fun there once Dave had a car, our little Toyota RAV 4. We couldn’t go anywhere prior to that.

There was the Ya-Ya- bus though.If you missed it by one second, he was gone. He waited for no one.

Once he took off on the Peasley family so none of them could get to school. Mind you, they were frequently late but I can just imagine how hard it was to pack up three little kids and two teachers before 730am every morning-that was tough.

Well, more Jubail stories later!

Penny Coat, Penny Flight

Now when I look back at this little story, it doesn’t seem so interesting, but it was at the time.

I had gone into the Driftwood Mall and had been trying on some coats. I saw a very long maxi cost:it was black. It fit me perfectly.

“How much is it?”, I asked. The young gal said “Oh, it’s a penny.”.

“no, how much is it really?”

“It’s a penny. It’s a penny coat. We often have coats and dresses on sale for a penny.

I had never ever heard of this. Well, I walked off with a penny coat!

The next week it was New Years Day. January 1st, 2005 it was. I was planning our trip to Scotland but I thought I’d throw in another country. I was looking at flights all over the world and lo and behold, I came across a “penny” flight to Poland. The flight was with an airline called “Wizz Air”. The flight landed in a strange town called Katowice-never heard of it. Remember, we really knew nothing about overseas flying at this time.

We landed in Katowice and a shuttle bus took us to Krakow. A very nice Polish girl and her Philipino-American husband Bernie Morillo(still see him on the facebook!). It was raining hard! they took us to a student cafe where we had hot soup , bread and beer. They just chucked Niall a beer too: Żywiec was their “Lucky” beer.

They met us again later in the trip. They made sure we got to the Air b and b safely and I remember the Polish gal reading the driver the riot act in Polish “no funny business”- and demanding he take us right to the hotel. So that was hilarious! We had a fantastic trip, seeing a classical and jazz festival.We also went to Auschwitz, which was very sobering. Niall enjoyed it too although it was a very long day. I don’t even know how we got there. Then we returned to London, meeting Billy and going to Ronnie Scott’s.

Denmark Musings 2010 Christmas

We had landed from Saudi and had to walk a long ways in the snow. I remember dragging my suitcase a long ways to an Air B and B. We got there and then proceeded to the main street of Copenhagen. I was overwhelmed with the Christmas sights. The Danes strode along the main street, their long blonde hair and their leggy legs, seemingly gloating on air: they looked to me like the Elves of Lothlorian. I was mesmerized and gob smacked all in one. We had tickets to dinner and a jazz show in Copenhagen. The waiter said “you will have to sit at a family table, with other people.” We said “Sure”. Everything was the antithesis of Saudi Arabia. Then he says “Oh well, I hope you don’t mind, but with each course I will bring you a different wine from Tuscany.”

“Oh, I really don’t mind at all!” Hello Denmark!

The Jazz was great, the food was amazing. The Danish hot dogs and the trip to Pandora were both divine.

Then came the trouble: the snow storm of the century. Paris shut down, Amsterdam shut down, Frankfurt shut down: snow, snow snow ice ice ice, wind wind wind: nightmare.

I noticed the first night that our flight wasn’t going anywhere the next morning so we thought ” well let’s get a ticket to speak to the agent just in case”.

Dave was smart to get a ticket, number 158. Off we went for an 11 hour frolick in downtown Copenhagen. I think we went to a Danish Catholic Church, lunch, museums, everything. We came back to the Executive suite in the Hilton (KLM had given us an executive room plus tons of food vouchers PLUS entrance to the Danish Christmas buffet which was incredible). At 6pm I went on line and noticed our flight to Amsterdam-Cuba was cancelled…again! I said “Dave, what are we gonna do?” Dave and I rushed down to the KLM ticket office. We got there and in 2 minutes they called ticket #…158. Oh my God. The luck of it. Uncanny.

They managed to schedule us onto a flight Copenhagen-Paris-Havana. The flight tried to take off the next morning but had to turn around. Too icy. We tried again 5 hours later.

Success but then we had literally seconds to catch the Havana flight. I have never run so fast in all my life.My heart was almost exploding. Funny side thought was, throughout the entire journey Dave was “sat” beside very large people. In this next flight he was “sat” beside two very large American ladies. There was a very large man sitting beside Dave on the flight Copenhagen-Amsterdam and there is no way he made the Havana flight.

We literally sat down (Air France) and within 3 minutes the plane took off. At least that is how I remember it.

When we finally got to Havana, Livi and Niall were so glad to see us. Of course our luggage was two days late and I had not clothes at all to wear. It was our 2nd time staying at Mary’s Place. We had lots of Havana fun. The kids had eaten terrible, terrible meals waiting for us-we were two days late. Then we took them to “La Fresa y chocolate” and they loved it. The real name of the restaurant is “La Guarida”.

Then we went on to Cayo de Santa Maria to Ensenachos: a full on resort.

https://www.iberostar.com/hoteles/cayo-ensenachos/iberostar-ensenachos/

 

It was beautiful but the weather was terrible!

A FUNNY STORY ABOUT ISRAEL/PALESTINE

I went on a pilgrimage to Israel/Palestine September/October 2019. It was superbly led by Fr Bob Holmes aka “Hobo”.

On one of the “Bethlehem” days, we has Mass in St Catherine’s Chapel, a small chapel associated with the Church of the Nativity. There was a Muslim lady on our trip named Ensaaf. She was very nice but she muttered things about the Jews which were entirely inappropriate. Anyway, during the Mass, she ate/drank the Eucharist, ie body and blood of Christ. Some people were incensed but I found it astonishing! The Catholic in me didn’t flinch because the world traveler in me just found it full circle and hilarious.

Later on at 7pm we gathered for our usual dinner. As the  Palestinian waiters were passing around the plates, I KNEW, absolutely KNEW, that the meat was pork. These were clearly very nice pork chops. Others in the group insisted it was chicken or lamb. Again, I just laughed at what was to transpire. Ensaaf, having taken the blody/blood of Christ at 9am, good Muslim lady that she is, was now about to eat a pork  chop.

I’m watching and waiting for her reaction. I say to her : “So Ensaaf, you’ve had quite a day. Eucharist in the morning, pork in the evening”.

“It is not pork, it is chicken!”, she insisted.

“Ok, let’s ask the waiter” What is it?

“It is pork Madame”, said the waiter. Ensaaf scolded him a bit in Arabic but it was not his fault. The throngs of Russian Orthodox pilgrims wanted pork and that’s what they got. You don’t mess around with the Russians. They basically fund the Holy Land with their constant pilgrimages. If you don’t time it right, you could end up in a 2 hour Russian Orthodox lineup to see the baby Jesus manger.

I could tell Ensaaf wanted to be sick and I understood, but I said…….

“Well Ensaaf, look at it this way. You confused the heck outta God today. He figured at 9am you started batting for our team, so he thought “Oi vay, let’s give the girl a pork chop to seal the deal!”

She was not amused. I hope she finds it funny now. For me, it was a delightful Saudi full circle moment. I would love to see this happen in downtown Khobar. Oh my!

WHEW I’M BACK IN!

I thought I lost my site but it is back.

Covid-19. What a disaster. I just don’t know what to think of it all.

Going back to March 2020, here is what happened:On March 6th we did a pretty good concert at Roy’s Towne Pub.Prior to that on Feb 13th Dave completely lost his voice and two months later, it is still not back.I think he damaged his vocal cords.

Anyway,March 9th, Mom and I left for Scotland. We were on business class and it was awesome. We got to Edinburgh, had a few excellent day visits with Suzanne, Len, Carole, Nicola, Kevin and Gabe. Kevin was super helpful, taking us around everywhere.

Round about the Friday 13 March, people were starting to talk about Covid 19 in Edinburgh.There were 6 cases. I knew I had to get down to Manchester so the next day we got on the train. My Mom was pretty good, even though she had had a stroke, like a mini stroke two weeks before.Her only problem was her too heavy suitcase.If I can convince her to go again, we can easily get her a trim line suitcase.

So we got to Manchester and lo and behold, our Corrie tour was cancelled.I was devastated. We had come all that way and to have the tour cancelled was just awful. Oh well.We went down to Media City and I could just see the viaduct part of the set through the locked gates. Never mind. Mom and I went to the Imperial War Museum instead.

When we got back to the hotel, we were getting prepared to go to Liverpool. The next morning, our bags all packed, I said “Mom do you want me to just get us tickets back?’

I had been getting tons of facebook messages from Livi and Dave telling me to turn back.

But in the UK it was business as usual. Oh dear. What to do?I tried for hours to get through to Aeroplan:no chance. So then this idea popped into my head:why don’t I just use Mom’s remaining points to get two brand new one way tickets.

Sure enough there were two one way tickets for us: Manchester/Frankfurt/Vancouver and we got them! Now they were economy but the airline managed to give us four seats instead of the two. It was a Lufthansa flight and it was ok.

I just knew I had to get my Mom home and she was relieved. We missed so much of the tour but as it happened, everything shut down like Stonehenge, all the London shows, etc. We did manage to get to Church on the Sunday and that was a real laugh.this handsome young man walks up to us as we were walking near the Church and, upon looking at Mom’s Irish scarf says “Ey up! Up the Irish!” Then he told us there was a St Pat’s parade that day! So off we go into the Church and who should walk up the aisle but the same young man-he was the Priest! Oh my that was funny!!

So that was that. I missed Liverpool AGAIN!! Someday I will get there and see all the Beatle sites.

But the best part was the Audrey Roberts moment. I had been daydreaming in my mind that Audrey Roberts came out of the gate at Corrie and said “Oh I am so sorry you missed the tour.”

Then Mom asked me, when we were walking about Media City “who is your favourite character?” I said, “Oh I love Audrey Roberts because she went from being a tarty woman to being the Mayor’s wife!”

Mom said “well I liked Hilda Ogden the most!”.So we were having a laugh thinking about our favourite characters.

Once I had booked the Manchester/Frankfurt.YVR flights, I thought, well what should we do for the rest of the day?

We agreed to go down to the Manchester Art Gallery and it was lovely!We went again to Pizza Express and there was hardly anyone in the restaurant.Things were looking a bit Covid-y. Then Kirsten called me crying, telling me she was stuck on an island in Thailand.

I convinced her to get to Bangkok, get a flight and get back to Toronto. Matt was telling her “get home”. She was very upset.So here I am , getting more upset, listening to Kirsten wailing, and I’m thinking about my Mom and hoping she doesn’t get sick and well, anyway, we continue to walk. We walk toward the Manchester Anglican Cathedral. I bent down to tie my bootlace, because it kept coming undone and when I stood up, who was right in front of me bu Sue Nichols (Audrey Roberts) herself in the flesh.

“Oh!”, I said, oh my its you Sue Nichols.Oh my! And then I just burst into tears.

I just could not possibly believe this was happening.There she was, just as I had predicted. Well, that was fantastic. My Mom loved talking to her and I managed to get two photos. So that was a sign that I had done the right thing. Sigh…..

Now I’ve been stuck at home.I had to do a 14 day isolation.When I got out Maureen and I got two coffees and went to 5th street:what a ghost town. It was awful, truly awful.

Now my days go like this:get up: coffee, shower, walk with Mo. Come home, laundry, dishes, practice flute, piano. Stretch. Write in journals. Talk to baby Zelda on Facetime.

Clean some more, plan dinner, maybe bake some. Maybe drive to some store.

But hardly anything is open. CERB:this is the Canadian Emergency fund:so far Dave and I have received $8000 between us, $2000 pp x 2. Apparently we get two more shots of it and then that is it. I just noticed TROLLS restaurant in Horseshoe Bay has opened up for take out so that is something.Things will slowly open up.

It’s pretty damn boring though. Mind you, I have never felt so rested but I am getting pretty fat. Gotta try to lose more weight!

Well that’s my COVID tale.

Coming back home after 10 years

It has been a big learning curve. Here are my observations since June 2019 when we came home for good, apparently!

The Feminization of Boys

I was in the nail salon. A large man and woman came in with their 9-10 year old son.The boy should have been in school. Instead the parents brought him to the nail salon for a pedicure.The Mom asked him if he wanted polish.The boy hesitated and , I think, because his Father said “no” for him, the boy said no. But if the Dad wasn’t there, I think he would have taken polish, as his Mother wanted him to. What in God’s name is going on? Why are  women today (this gal looked about 40) deliberately feminizing their sons? I just don’t get it. If you’re gay, ok, good for you, be gay. I’m fine with that. But why is there a trend amongst parents today to overtly feminize their boys?

Last evening I was at a musical. Some of the choices struck me as very , very odd.

It has a Greek theme whereby there were “sisters”: the lead actress would say “Sisters of Greece”.Two of the “sisters” were boys wearing dresses. Why? Why not say “brothers and sisters of Greece” and have the two boys, both excellent dancers, dressed according to their biological gender? I just don’t get it. Here were these two boys happily dancing around in gowns. 10 years ago? Would have never happened. Forget the genderization, it was just such an odd directorial choice. I absolutely just don’t understand this!

A lot of people here “make up” problems. BC is paradise:beautiful air, clean streets, free medical, most people can afford dental, most people can afford good food and housing.

So because there are no real problems, people make sh** up. Honestly, this whole allergy to my perfume  business is ridiculous.There is no problem with my perfume or anyones’ perfume overseas. Overseas, everything smells, sometimes good, sometimes bad but no one, NO ONE ever complained about my very expensive beautiful perfume.Well the only person to really complain is my husband and I have limited the amount  I use but come on people! When I wear perfume into the schools, all the kids walk in the room and say “Oh wow it smells so great in here!

Sigh….I don’t know what to do with my own culture any more. It is so messed up here.

10 years later I see a very liberal Social Justice warrior attitude has taken hold.Everyone is  afraid to have an opinion. If you disagree with a SJW, you are called out and demonized, for daring to disagree with him/her.That’s not democracy, that’s fascism, a one way conversation. What a world, what a world.

 

The Saudi Air force has a heart!

This brings back memories of Saudi 2014 when the Saudi government “banned” Cheerios because there was a “heart” on the front of its boxes, which to them was a Christian holiday called St Valentines Day.  They thought the Cheerio boxes were celebrating Valentines Day so it had to be banned!

In response, the very next day, the Saudi air force, with British trained pilots as their teachers, flew across the skies of Khobar, making red “hearts” in the air with red smoke coming out of their engines. I watched all of this from our pool on An Nassim, our  compound, just marveling at the pilots’  amazing ability and the amazing stupidity of the Saudi religious police/government. What a moment!

I just lay there in the pool thinking “this is so beautiful and you Mutawa, well you are just so dumb!” How could you get it so wrong?!

The Mutawa did some funny things. The Dammam school of ISG held a “prom” night at the Holiday Inn in Damman. Ironically and coincidentally, the Mutawa had a “get together” night of their own in the same hotel. When the Mutawa saw grade 12 boys and girls mixing freely, with the girls wearing sexy dresses, well they just went nuts!

The Principal nearly was jailed, the girls were rounded up, it was total utter chaos.

The Principal shoulda (coulda shoulda woulda) known better with a gang like them!

Honestly the Mutawa were so hilarious. They would walk around the Malls with wooden “switches” ready to hit the Arab girls for walking with too much confidence, for wearing nail polish, etc. She says “You are not the boss of me!” I love this girl!

I heard of a Saudi-American girl who was stopped by the Mutawa because she “walked like a man.” in the Dhahran Mall which I visited a lot.

“What do you mean?, said the girl?

The Mutawa said “You walk with too much confidence.You must stop this.” What a bunch of clowns!!

 

“Mrs Harvey, Who the hell is Anne Frank and why is she so mean to my Justin?”

What a moment that was! It was Spring time 2014. Faten, this lovely Somali girl, but not someone to be trifled with, burst into the little theatre at Dhahran school.

“Mrs Harvey, who the hell is this Anne Frank chick and why is she being so mean to my Justin?”

“Ok, let’s break this down, let’s unpack this “, I said, knowing exactly where she was going with this tirade!

Well it seems that Justin Bieber made a big slip up in 2014 at the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam.

Image result for Justin Bieber at Anne Frank house in 2014 and image

Why would he write such a dumb thing? The answer is, because he was denied  any cultural literacy, he didn’t go to school because the entertainment industry took over his life.

But then what’s the other side of the coin?Why did Faten not know of Anne Frank? Who was Anne Frank to her? She, a Somali Muslim, born and raised in Khobar, Saudi Arabia, where any teaching of anything Jewish is…..verboten!! She didn’t have a clue about anything remotely concerning the Holocaust or Anne Frank, whereas most children in America and Canada learn about Anne Frank in grade 5 at least.

But  then, later, why did Beyonce take a selfie there? Are we being too judgmental?Maybe Anne, lover of Hollywood stars, would have been thrilled to know that Justin and Beyonce visited her home.Judging by the posters and photographs she posted in her room, I imagine Anne would have loved meeting them both. But that’s not for us to say I guess. That poor little girl died in the gas chambers at Auschwitz: it doesn’t get any worse than that. She was, however,  a very hopeful young lady. Ah, what to say to Faten?

Related image

“Ok, Faten, here’s what happened. Anne Frank was a little German Jewish girl who, with her family, hid in an attic atop a house on the canal near Haarlem, in Amsterdam. She wrote down her memoirs in several diaries. Sadly, very sadly indeed, she died in the gas chambers at Auschwitz, a fate none of us even wish to contemplate for a second. And yet, her diaries gave the world so much hope!”

So when Justin wrote “Anne Frank…hopefully, she would have been a belieber”-well the woke left and right just flipped out. How could he say something so crass, so wrong, so uneducated, so insensitive? The answer is, exactly why you didn’t know who Anne was: you were BOTH denied education, you were BOTH denied under oppressive rule: YOU by the Saudi government, and Justin, but the insanity of pop culture and the ravaging effects it has on young stars.Look no further than Judy Garland to see what  havoc the industry can wreak on   young starlets.

“Faten, I know I am not allowed to teach you anything “Jewish” in Saudi Arabia”, I said, addressing the whole class. But class (my grade 11/12 Drama class), since I am leaving in June 2014, AND they can’t really fire me at this point, would you like me to teach you about Anne Frank, about the Holocaust, through a dramatic lens?”

Of course the kids said yes, and from then on we studied plays, monologues, scenes, stories, under the banner of Holocaust education. It was as if I had invented the whole thing: the kids, having been educated solely in Saudi Arabia, had never, ever heard of Anne Frank, the final solution, Auschwitz…none of it. Hard to believe right?

Well the same thing happened to Justin Bieber.While he was flying all over the world singing pop songs and busting cool dance moves, his Mother and the industry neglected to educate him on important facts of history.

It was the same for Queen Elizabeth II if you watch The Crown.She too felt denied a wholistic education, as her studies were confined to Constitutional law, etc.

So, because of Justin’s mistake and Faten’s blow up (she worshipped Justin Bieber) 25 Muslim kids got a huge Holocaust education from me. At least I did my job!

https://www.cnn.com/2014/02/04/world/europe/anne-frank-toys/index.html

 

By the way, I hope this next post is fake cuz it is messed up!

Image result for Justin Bieber at Anne Frank house in 2014 and image

Summer of 2019

We left Korea 5th June 2019.We flew out on KLM and landed in Amsterdam. I didn’t quite have the address of the hotel “EDEN” so some bus that we took did not drop us at the correct spot.Luckily, we found a young Muslim taxi lad who took us right there.He was really kind. We went to Elton John 8th June at the Ziggo Dome. I loved that Elton John stopped playing and just spoke kindly to the audience for 10 minutes, talking about his life and thanking all the fans for staying with him all these years. He was a true gentleman! The film Rocket Man had just come out but he didn’t really mention it. He spoke more about his children, his husband David,etc. And he talked about his AIDS foundation and how it helps a lot of people. Very wonderful show but fancy people just sitting there, drinking prosecco. All very civilized! Not like 1973! I loved that Ray Cooper came out in 1974 and there he was again 2019-and so was I.I remember being quite incensed that this “Ray Cooper” had joined the band. My 14 year old self couldn’t get past the notion that this Ray Cooper was not on the album “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road”. I was so into being black and white. Now in 2019, he was back again, not really looking much different!

We found a superb jazz club called Cafe Jazz Alto.I think we went there four times.Amsterdam is great but it is super super expensive.We also went out to the countryside and went inside a windmill.That was very fun.Major tourist attraction!

Then we flew KLM to Birmingham. We then took a train to Stratford upon Avon and got a taxi to the B and B called The White Sails. It was lovely! Quite amazing how we are able to figure all this out. And it was so nice taking the train, seeing the countryside as you drive towards Stratford upon Avon. The Shakespeare site were great there.

The acting at the RSC was just “ok”.In fact, I’d say it is much better at Bard on the Beach,Vancouver.

One girl though was incredible.She was in a wheelchair and she bombed around that set like it was no one’s business. And she was a superb actress.She just flew in that wheelchair.I’d say she was just as much of an athlete as an actress.

Then on June 12th or so we received a facebook messenger from Morven saying Granny M was failing.We flew home as planned Friday June 17th.Dave got over to Granny Saturday June 18th.We had a little birthday “highland fling” piper come for my Mum’s 80th.That was funny. So off Dave went and then he took the Island express up Monday morning 17th June. I had just gotten a rental car from Toyota.Granny died around 1030am that morning. So that was very sad and unexpected.

Then Olivia began developing high blood pressure so they took the baby three weeks early.Thank goodness everyone was ok. Little Zelda is now 4 weeks old and as cute as ever.

Frances got married August 24th on my Dad’s birthday.Her new husband is Peter so she is Frances Topliss. I was very worried watching her at the aisle because she was weaving back and forth.I thought she was going to faint. She was very nervous and giggly.But she got through it. the party after was great at her house.

We had previously been to Toronto to see Kirsten in a circus show and then we saw “Dear Evan Hanson”plus “Come from Away” both exceptional productions.

I’m quite happy to have left SFS. It was just too much for me. I was bored teaching middle school drama. It was mandatory drama and that was just weird.

I prefer more process theatre and it is just too much rah-rah for me. Great staff, amazing shows, but the tech actually upstages the actors.They are just kids, very talented ,but too much high tech stuff: the makeup,costumes,lights,sets, sound, all way over the top.If it were just one/two shows a year, yes that would be fine.But there were 7 productions and I think that is excessive. I loved working with Edie Moon though.She is a very special person on this earth and I will always remember her kindness and her great talent. It was just too American for me.

Now that we are home: well we bought our new car today, a RAV 4 XLE.Fancy, fancy.

And today is our 41st wedding anniversary. I guess that’s quite a few years!

I will be flying to Calgary with my Mum on Friday to see wee Zelda again. I miss her so much!

Dave is painting our house a beautiful colour! Well that’s the summer of 2019.